
Through the mat, onto the arena floor, and into Beth Phoenix's arms, WWE superstars went everywhere for this year's SummerSlam. It's easy to be disappointed by WWE's tent pole summer season pay-per-view. By design, it's more laid back and experimental than WrestleMania. When Vince McMahon first added SummerSlam to the ppv roster in 1988, it was meant to be a mini version of the big dance in April. In reality, it turned out to be a supercard house show broadcast for $19.95 (I think that's how much it cost back them). I mean, look at the cards from the first few shows. The WWE Championship wasn't even contested until the third one, and that in an unmemorable repacking of the Rick Rude/Ultimate Warrior Intercontinental Championship program for the big belt.
Still, SummerSlam has included some of WWE's best work of the year at times. John Cena v. Randy Orton from '07, Hulk Hogan v. Shawn Michaels from '05, and HBK's classic with Triple H from '02 are recent ones that come to mind.
This year's Hell in a Cell was probably the best one since another great HBK/Trips match from Bad Blood '04, the silly fireball ending not withstanding. But like SummerSlams past, the rest of the card was fun, but largely unremarkable.
Let;s have a look:
Jeff Hardy v. MVP ***1/2
Rumor is that this slot was supposed to be filled by a United States Championship match between Ken Kennedy and Shelton Benjamin. With Mr. Kennedy's injury, that tanked, and the bad karma that seems to affect both performers at every step of their careers keeps going.
The replacement was worth it, though--a solid match between two guys who look to be heading up the ladder to the main event. It looked as if both went through pains to prove Jeff Hardy's neck was in fact not broken.
So where do each go from here? Will Jeff be embroiled in yet another midcard title program? Will MVP finally come into his own and get a main event push? I hope so, for both.
Intergender Tag Team Match, winner takes both Intercontinental and Women's Championships: Beth Phoenix & Santino Marella v. Mickie James & Kofi Kingston ****
What can I say? For entertainment value, this match stole the show. Not since Andy Kaufman has intergender wrestling been so interesting. Just when you think Santino Marella is getting stale, here he comes with an excellent Beth Phoenix program. How awesome is it when he jumps into Beth's arms Scooby-Doo style when frightened? How great is when it's Santino hoisted into Beth's shoulders after the victory?
And if the Intercontinental Champion is not going to be used as the workhorse traditional wrestling title that catapults its carriers to the main event, at least use it in a way that makes me want to watch an IC Championship match.
It might be a blessing in disguise for Kofi Kingston to have lost. He didn't actually take the fall, and this gives him an opportunity to really develop into the megastar he's destined to become. I've been of the opinion that Kingston came out of the oven too quickly. He'd have been better served becoming a main eventer on ECW. Wouldn't you want to see a David versus Goliath match between him and Mark Henry?
But the ending is bittersweet. Yes, I laughed after Marella's wistful embrace of the title while saying, "I've missed you." I still miss the days when the having IC title meant you were the top of the midcard and there were hungry wrestlers breathing down your neck.
ECW Championship Match: Matt Hardy v. Mark Henry 1/2*
It might make business sense to have a fewer than 30 seconds match ending in disqualification. Then you can sell the rematch as the main event on Tuesday's ECW on SciFi. It could be risky. Viewers might be turned off by the non-event and not bother to even tune in. For forty bucks, I wanted to see Matt Hardy wrestle Mark Henry. Having a free rematch two days later is no consolation.
World Heavyweight Championship Match: John Bradshaw Layfield v. CM Punk ***
I give this match three stars because it never really got going. Layfield and Punk bonked heads, busting Punk open hardway. Perhaps fearing a concussion, the match was sent home early and we still don't know if Punk can put together a classic on the WWE main stage.
It's starting to look like Punk's title reign is jinxed. He's booked as a perennial underdog. He doesn't really have much of a cache of top heel opponents from which to choose, and so far, his ppv matches have been--through no fault of this own--uninspiring.
I do hope things swing Punk's way soon, because this is looking to be the biggest championship bust since Rey Mysterio's short Championship reign two years ago. CM Punk can be the face of the company and be as huge a star as The Rock, Steve Austin, or Bret Hart ever were. That is, if WWE would just let him carry the ball.
WWE Championship Match: The Great Khali v. Triple **1/2
Was anyone excited to see this go down? The real focus of SmackDown these days is the Edge/Undertaker La Familia show. Since Triple H is the current title holder, it seems this match was cobbled together to give Trips something to do.
There's not much else I can say here except this match met all my expectations. And they weren't very high.
Dave Batista v. John Cena **1/2
Has it really come down to this? Remember the days when a meeting between the top two guys in the company would give you chills or make your pulse race? Think back to Steve Austin and The Rock's WrestleMania trilogy. Go back further to the Ironman match between Bret Hart and Shawn Michaels. There are others: Hulk Hogan and Randy Savage, Andre and Hogan, Hogan and Piper, Backlund and Snuka, Backlund and Graham. Even when Triple H clashed with Cena, at least it was interesting.
Here we had no build, no emotional investment, and two guys whose careers are built on how interesting their opponents are. You hear a lot about what would happen when the irresistible force meets the immovable object. Here we had the two immoveable objects basking in their own inertia.
To make matters worse, the Cena epic has even become stale. He put together great pieces with Triple H, Randy Orton, and Edge. With Batista is just looked like more of the same.
Although, I am surprised Cena kost this. In fact, I'm surprised that Cena only has two pay-per-view wins to his name this season. His time is obviously not now.
Hell in a Cell: Edge v. Undertaker ****
Ok, so it's been going on since Survivor Series 2007. Edge took a little break to deal with Rey Mysterio, then he headlined WrestleMania with Undertaker and the two kept going and going and going and going. Methinks the Hell in a Cell will end it all, but who's to say. It might be nice to have a feud book ended by two HIAC matches. At least Batista didn't swing by and somehow lift the entire cell onto his shoulders or some other ridiculous act.
Oh yes, the match.
Very good. Not as good as I expected, but my expectations were way too high. With all the hoopla over Mick Foley's HIAC meeting with Undertaker ten years ago, I really expected someone else to go off the top again. Perhaps no one else should, since the stunt would never live up to the original.
Instead, we got a fairly intense match with some pretty badass spots. Edge is starting to become Sabu-like when it comes to tables (they might break now in fear by his just looking at them). And we had an awesome finish...until...
Having Edge go through the ring was enough. It was great punctuation for the silver medal match of the year candidate (first honors undoubtedly must be Flair/Michaels). Why the fireball?
Are we to believe that Edge was burned to crisp on impact? Are we expected to buy that Edge actually completed some trans-dimensional journey and is now actually in the physical place called Hell?
There's no polite way to say this. It's dumb. These types of antics are what caused many viewers to shy away from WWE in the early 1990s and switch over to WCW. With so many cartoonish gimmicks and so many performers named The (Something) -ala The Undertaker, the Brooklyn Brawler, the Warlord, the Viking etc.-I half expected a three-man tag team consisting of the Butcher, the Baker, and the Candlestick Maker to show up. Maybe I shouldn't give them any ideas.
I have a problem with Undertaker being sold to us as a supernatural creature. It doesn't fit. It violates the internal rules of pro wrestling. I expect this kind of thing from "The X-Files" but not from sports-entertainment.
In a perfect world, Undertaker uses the dry ice and strobe lights to intimidate--to strike fear in the hearts of his opponents. At best he should just be tight with the lighting and sound guys to help pull off his ominous thing. I just can't buy that he really summons lightning bolts from the ceiling.
It's Batman, not Spawn.
The climax aside, however, I'd say Edge and Undertaker put on their best match of this program. I'm just cringing at the prospect of Edge returning as some sort of undead vampire with Kevin Thorn. I can only sigh.
Other thoughts:
Where is Big Show? Yes, I know he was in the dark match at the Fieldhouse in Indianapolis. But why isn't he factoring into the main event picture? I'd have thought he'd have a world title by now. The guy was a centerpiece attraction of WrestleMania XXIV. Wouldn't you have rather seen Big Show wrestle Triple H than Khali?...And Ok, the Chris Jericho Shawn Michaels piece was cool, but couldn't this have been done the next day on Raw? I see no reason to pay to see guys talk to each other. That's why debates are on free TV.


chris jericho just cold cocked shawn micheals wife. not only that but then left he left her wit a jacked up lip. if i were shawn micheals i would have kicked him to sleep.
petabo12:34 AM EST