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A friend of mine, who is a nurse & talked to me about the Atkins Diet, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, & the latest of course, The South Beach Diet.  Since she is a nurse, & has done a lot of study & research on dieting, I truly think she has found the real answer to weight loss: 

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Murphy's law

 
1. If u think a girl is beautiful, she'll always have a boyfriend to confirm that

2. the nicer she is...the quicker u will be dumped!!!!!

3. The more the makeup, worse the looks...

4. "99% of the girls in this world are beautiful. Remaining 1% would always be in your company.".................100% true

5. The guy standing next to a beautiful girl can never be her brother.

6. If by any chance the girl you like , likes you too, she will let you know in about 10 years from now ,when you are committed..

7. The more you ignore a girl, the more she'll want to be friends with you.

8. Theory of relativity......

The more u run towards a hot chick....the more she goes away from u...

9. Rule 1: Even if you got her out alone... just when you are about to let her know about your feelings...she will spot a long lost friend( I guess from Kumbh ka Mela)

Corollary to rule 1: The more desperate you are to tell your feelings to a girl on a private chat, the more probability the long lost friend she discovered is a handsome superman, who beats you in everything 9:1

Axiom 1: The more dedicated you are to the girl, the longer it takes before things work out, but ultimately it will (somesmile for the guys)

10. the day the chick you really like comes and speaks to you will be the day when-

1. You are dressed badly
2. You forgot to brush your teeth for the first time in your life
3.Have a bad hair day

11. all the good girls are either nuns or married .the rest go around with u and ruin ur money,health and leave u a total wreck.

12. the more seriously u like a girl...the more seriously her dad will hate u

13. the love you shower a girl with is directly proportional to the number of bullets her dad will be showering at you

The Plumber on Run
 

 
 

A man knocked the door of house. The lady opened the door.

The man said, "I am the here on the run, to fix your leaky pipe."

The Lady said, "We don't have any leaky pipe here."


The plumber on run, says, "My note reads, your house called for a Plumbing Emergency, address looks exact, Aren't you Mrs. johnr?"

The Lady says, "No, Mathurs moved away about a year back from this house. We are peters."

The plumber grimaces, "What kind of people are they, Calls for an Emergency repair and then move away."

NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOM
 

 
 

A Mom comes to visit her son Kumar for dinner.....who lives with a girl roommate Sunita. During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Kumar's roommate was. She had long been suspicious of a relationship between the two, and this had only made her more curious.

 

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Kumar and his roommate than met the eye.

 


Reading his mom's thoughts, Kumar volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Sunita and I are just roommates." About a week later, Sunita came! To Kumar saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver plate. You don't suppose she took it, do you?" Kumar said ,"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, jjust to be sure."

 

So he sat down and wrote :

 

Dear Mother:

 

I'm not saying that you 'did' take the silver plate from my house, I'm not saying that you 'did not' take the silver plate .. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

 

Love, Kumar

 

Several days later, Kumar received an email from his Mother which read

 

Dear Son:

 

I'm not saying that you 'do' sleep with Sunita, and I'm not saying that you 'do not' sleep with Sunita. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the silver plate by now under the pillow...

 

Love,

 

Mom.

 

Lesson of the day:

 

Don't Lie to Your Mother...........especially if she is Indian !

 


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