Well this is sort of a preview of my blog piece for the Fatal 4-Way over on MySpace. Actually it's my entire blog piece for this weekend. I wasn't planning on writing for the Fatal 4-Way this week as I really desperately need a night off but here it is...
Just a warning, I get a bit crass in this blog. I'm kinda mean!
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Yeah, so I kinda fibbed here. I know I said I was likely to take the week off. And many of you are probably groaning that I didn't. But I plan to cash in soon enough with weekend off. As it is, it's a bit of a struggle tonight to actually think of something constructive to say. So I thought I would get a bit premature here and go with...The Night Of Champions, pay-per-view, formally known as Vengeance. Yay for a name change. What I figured I would do is do a run-down of the matches for next weeks Pay-Per-View, so that I can do stuff on the Draft next weeks since I can't do anything more about the draft than **** and moan about it and I've already done that...twice! With the pending Draft happening this Monday night, I'm not convinced too many titles will actually change hands. But I guess we'll see.
Kane is set to defend his ECW Championship against The Big Show. The Big Show was a former ECW Champion back in 2006 before he left the company to do things. Like lose weight and rehab his back and knees. This is a tough match to call. Both men are giants, Kane is no slouch at 7'0 326-pounds, but Show has about 115-pounds on Kane at 441-pounds. It's the match of the giants. To see who can strong hold who. Kane has held the title since WrestleMania, and Big Show has yet to hold a Championship since his return at No Way Out this past February. I think this may be the one time that the Championship would change hands, except I think Kane will retain by way of Disqualification. Meaning, Big Show gets DQ-ed!
The Miz and John Morrison will defend their WWE Tag Team Championships against "father and son" team of Finlay and Hornswoggle. To me this would be a no contest but that little person is a feisty bugger and you never know if Horny could actually become WWE Tag Team Champion with his pseudo father, Finlay. Face it, The ****...err...I mean the Miz and John Morrison have had the WWE Tag Team Championships for some time now. Seven months to be exact. They're cocky and arrogant but maybe they have a reason to be. That's why they're still champions. I believe that John Morrison and The Miz will retain their Tag Team Championships.
Now for the Match I'll be waiting for... Matt Hardy will defend his United States Championship against former ECW Champion, Chavo Guerrero I'm not looking forward to a Chavo match as much as I am for it being a Matt Match. I'm probably one of the biggest M'fer's out there and support Matt Hardy 100% in his career. I'm totally on board with campaigning to get him to the World Championship, but for now, we need to make him one of the strongest United States Champions since MVP. Chavo Guerrero is an excellent wrestler, and an even better antagonist. Matt Hardy has his fans, his health and his drive to get him to the top. He's a harder worker and has a stronger head on his shoulders. Matt Hardy will retain his championship, as I think Chavo Guerrero will be disqualified due to outside interference by Bam Neely.
The World Tag Team Champions, Hardcore Holly and Cody Rhodes go up against a third generationer, Ted DiBiase Jr and his mystery partner, rumoured to be third generationer DH Smith, or TJ Wilson. One or the other. We have yet to see the Million Dollar Heir in the ring, so it's hard to speculate how this match will go. As far as my extreme distaste for Choda Boy Rhodes goes, I have to remain unbiased. He and Holly have had decension within the ranks of their team lately. Holly doesn't like younger talent, he's always made that well known, but does that include his partner? Choda thinks that he's capable of making team decisions without discussing it with his more experienced partner. If Cody Rhodes makes business decisions like his old man, Dusty Rhodes, than this team is sunk! If DiBiase's partner is indeed, DH Smith, we can count on a decent match up. DH Smith may lack the size his father, The British Bulldog had, but he's a good wrestler. After all he does have those Hart family genes running through his veins. If it wasn't for the first look at the Million Dollar heir in his debut match, then I would have deemed this match as the "GO PEE" match of the night. I believe a title change will happen in this match and Mystery Partner and Ted DiBiase Jr will walk out of this Pay-Per-View as World Tag Team Champions.
This is an unlikely match. Mickie James will defend her Women's Championship against Katie Lea Burchill. Katie Lea last week got a clean win over the Women's Champion. Original rumours had this match as a Ladder Match with Beth Phoenix and Mickie James. I guess that has been put on hold. Too bad because I was seriously looking forward to that. However, in Ohio Valley Wrestling in 2007, it was former Women's champion, Beth Phoenix taking on Katie Lea in a...you guessed it, ladder match. So could we see that coming either at Great American Bash next month or at Summer Slam? I only hope we do. I just need to say that it looks like Katie Lea pilfered Lita's pre-Hardy Boyz wardrobe. You remember the days when Lita worked with Essa Rios? You don't? Then I don't blame you. Haha!!! Anyways, I predict that for now Mickie James is safe and will keep her Women's Championship.
Edge will defend his coveted World Championship against The Animal, Batista. Edge has the backing of an army standing behind him. His engagement to the General Manager, Vickie Guerrero, her nephew, Chavo and his body guard, Bam, as well as Hawkins and Ryder all in his corner. Is that miniature Army going to be enough to stop The Animal from taking that Championship away from Edge? Probably. Not to take anything away from Batista, but all the muscles in the world is not going to help you when you're up against one of the smartest Canadians ever to grace the WWE. Yeah it's true, we're generally better lovers than fighters, but Edge has proven (time and time again) that he's both. He'll fight for what is his and right now, what's his is the World Championship. Whether or not Batista actually comes out on top, he won't be leaving with that title belt around his waist. SmackDown General Manager will see to that. However, I predict a sneak attack and a cashing in of a certain Money In the Bank opportunity by CM Punk. The Straight Edge taking on The Cutting Edge, it what may just prove to be the upset of a lifetime. However that is a long shot, and I believe that CM Punk will keep his Money In The Bank brief case close to his side for the time being. Edge will walk out with the World Championship still around his waist. After all, Undertaker is due back soon and he'll need incentive to go after Edge.
Groan! Not this again... The King of Kings, Triple H, will defend his WWE Championship against what Sarge refers to the Cat Killer, John Cena. It's true, every time Cena wins, God kills a kitten. John Cena goes from defeating JBL right back at the top to take on Triple H for the WWE Championship. No doubt the belt will end back on Cena's waist eventually as it's still the tacky Spinner Style title. Yeah its kinda cool to look at but it's a novelty belt. It takes the importance out of the championship. OMG I totally just got that!!! When it is around Cena's waist the importance is already gone regardless, that's why it's a novelty belt. OMG I must have been on drugs not to have figured that out sooner. I do not look forward to yet another Triple H vs. Cena match. In fact, I may not stick around to see this match. With any luck it'll be last so I can leave for work early. You can only tolerate so much eye pain. Cena has been walking around making an ass of himself by referring that he and Triple H are 2 of the Best Wrestlers of all time, well he's half right. Triple H IS one of the Best, but Cena, he's funny!!! C'mon! Lmao!!! He's a good joke teller. Thinking he's one of the Best. Hell thinking he's a wrestler at all is rather hilarious!!! What the douche has Cena been smoking? Anyways, Triple H will walk out Champion.
And one more thing? There's a belt missing. Hell if you wanna get technical, there are two belts missing but since the Cruiserweight championship is nowhere to be found lately, there really is only one prominent championship missing. The Intercontinental Championship. The question is, will Chris Jericho be defending his Intercontinental Championship against the ultimate ****, Shawn Michaels? HBPray might not be ready to return. I'll admit that I haven't been paying attention to his antics this time around since he's basically full of **** that I haven't believed a word out of his mouth since the Screw Job back in '97. Lets say for the sake of things, that Chris Jericho IS defending his Intercontinental Championship against Shawn Michaels. I would have to say that Shawn Michaels will win the match by disqualification or Count-out, but will not walk out Intercontinental Champion.
That's my story and I'm sticking to it! Like all good comedy routines and self-righteous opinionated writers, it's time to end this ball-buster. There could have been so much more potential in this years Night of Champions Pay-Per-View, but as I sat here running it down, I couldn't help by feel a major disappointment. I'm not sure spending $39.99 for just Matt Hardy's match is worth it. I guess we'll never know until next weekend whether I bite the bullet and get it.
Take care and happy Summer Dayz to you all!
