12/05/2008 - 12/07/2008; from the Air Canada Centre in Toronto, Ontario
commentating by WWE Hall-of-Famer Jerry "The King" Lawler & WCW Owner Shane McMahon

DAY 1:
MoneyBags Wrestling Organization Owner Nathaniel Evander Westfield Farnsworth saunters out onto the ring entrance ramp stage, where he welcomes the MWO fans to this great pay-per-view event, where the new Haughty Hotties champion will be determined; since there are only a small fraction of ladies who wrestle in MWO, naturally that means that there won't be nearly as many single-elimination matches needed to determine the new champ, so the tournament's only going to take a grand total of 3 days; My World Order leader "MoneyBags" Malcolm DiBiase storms out onto the ring entrance ramp stage, where he gets all up in the grill of his antagonist, proclaiming that N~E~W~F knows that it's only a matter of time before he gets his federation back, so it's just as well for him to give it up now; Farnsworth openly laughs in DiBiase's face, saying that it'll take more than some bold proclamations before he'll give up his very lucrative investment; MoneyBags then challenges Nathaniel to pick a Tag Team to compete in a Tornado match, the winner of which will hold the controlling interest in the company; smiling broadly, N~E~W~F shakes Malcolm's hand & then calls for the 1st match to start; 1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: April "Riot" Littlejohn versus Mary Kate Olzen versus Druscilla versus Harlequinn; Juliet Landau's Most Bonable Characterization gets ousted by the Heavy Metal Maniac, who gets eliminated by the Olzen Grrl, who then horfs CryptKeeper's Main Squeeze {PSYCHOLOGY: um. . .  what?!}; as Ashley accompanied Mary Kate to the ring, as did Willow accompany Druscilla, it's just as well to progress directly into the next 1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Willow Rosenvamp versus Ashley Olzen versus Whoopi Goldberg versus Thyroid Marie; Da WOMAN! ousts the Former Grammar Police, eliminates the Olzen Grrl & horfs the Dopplegangland Vampress {PSYCHOLOGY: Gollllllllldberrrrrrrrrg!!!}

FanBoy Mark Jabroni leads Torrie Wilson to the ring, much to the chagrin of Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley, who knows it's really Reverend Jacob Clemens under that mask, but after a few harsh whisperings of "Kayfabe!!" under his breath, the RING RUST host apparently got through to Nipple H, which allows the commencement of the following 1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Yudu Nada versus Bif Nekkid versus Stephanie McMahon-Helmsley versus Torrie Wilson; the Whistler, BC Rocker gets ousted by Nipple H, the Matriarch of the Nada Clan gets eliminated by the Former WWE Diva, who then horfs the ECW Owner {PSYCHOLOGY: seemed appropriate somehow, the match coming down to Stepho-Mac & Torrie!}

1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Anjelina Croft versus Spread-Mae the CowPoker versus P!nk versus Nexus; Wrestling's Easiest Woman gets ousted by the Tomb Raider Knockoff, who gets eliminated by the Former CEW Lady President, who in turn gets horfed by the Punk-Pop Princess {PSYCHOLOGY: wow, how embarrassing, I'd better not tag her in Facebook & let her get a gander @ this outcome! . . .}

DAY 2:
Reverend Jacob Clemens, dressed not @ all like FanBoy Mark Jabroni, leads the Great Kat, Daffney & Vampyra Dæmonica to the ring, where he proclaims that it's finally time for 2 of these violent femmes to fight for his hot sweaty monkey-love; 1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: River Tam versus Vampyra Dæmonica versus the Great Kat versus Taarna the Last Terakian; the Guitar Shredder gets ousted by the Hardcore Harlot, the "Heavy Metal" Heroine gets eliminated by Summer Glau's Most Bonable Characterization, who then gets horfed by Vampyra {PSYCHOLOGY: sweet!}; after the match, the Extremist Evangelist turns to the Scream Queen & declares that it's now her turn; 1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Predator War Queen versus Daffney versus FBI Special Agent Dana Scully versus DemoniKa; Gillian Anderson's Most Bonable Characterization gets ousted by Vicki the Terrible, who also eliminates the Predator War Queen, but who in torn gets horfed by The WCW Scream Queen {PSYCHOLOGY: giggidy!}

1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: "BlakWidow" Amanda Storm versus Sosumi Nada versus True Danziger versus UEO Lieutenant Katy Hitchcock; the BlakWidow gets ousted by the Cutest, Schoolgirlest Member of the Nada Clan, J. Madison Wright's Most Memorable Portrayal gets eliminated by Stacey Haiduk's Most Bonable Characterization, who then gets horfed by Sosumi {PSYCHOLOGY: most honourable win for the Nada Clan!}

1st ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Avril Lavigne versus Meg-O-Powers versus Chyna versus Jerome the Gay Tiger; the Former RING RUST Co-Host gets ousted by the 9th Wonder of The World, then Wrestling's Straightest Man gets eliminated by the Napanee, Ontario Rocker, who also horfs the 1st Female WWF Intercontinental Champion {PSYCHOLOGY: yeah, that seemed realistic. . .}

DAY 3:
FanBoy Mark Jabroni once again accompanies Torrie Wilson to ringside, where he sets her lose on the following 2nd ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Mary Kate Olzen versus Torrie Wilson versus P!nk versus Sosumi Nada; the Olzen Girl gets ousted by the former WWE Diva, Alecia Moore gets eliminated by the Heir to the Nada Fortune, who also horfs the Future Ex-Missus Jabroni {PSYCHOLOGY: dang! . . .}; after that match, the RING RUST host quickly jumps into a nearby telephone booth, from where a few moments later the Reverend Jacob Clemens emerges, looking for all intents & purposes like a man who'd just changed clothes rather hastily in a cramped telephone booth {seems appropriate, I'd think!}, then calls Vampyra Dæmonica & Daffney back down to ringside, where he turns to each woman in turn & demands that they beat the sweet heterosexual bejeezus out of each other, in the name of proving which of them loves him most of all; 2nd ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, BATTLE ROYAL MATCH: Whoopi Goldberg versus Vampyra Dæmonica versus Daffney versus Avril Lavigne; Da WOMAN gets ousted by the Scream Queen, who also eliminates the Japanese wrestling sensation & the Napanee Punk Chick {PSYCHOLOGY: whoa, nice! . . .}

My World Order leader "MoneyBags" Malcolm DiBiase saunters down to the ring, where he introduces his aces in the hole, the Princes of the Universe; MoneyBags Wrestling Organization owner Nathaniel Evander Westfield Farnsworth emerges from backstage & struts his way down to ringside, where he introduces his own totally awesome Tornado Tag Team tandem. . .  the Remnants of the Old School, who prepare to square off in the following TORNADO TAG TEAM, EXHIBITION MATCH: MWO Tornado Tag Team champions Princes of the Universe (Monster & Dark Rahvenn) versus Remnants of the Old School ("Paragon of Virtue" Mike Burry & "Single H" DT Power); Monster pins Power & Burry with an 'Apocalypse Slam' Dangerous Powerbomb in This Non-Title Match {PSYCHOLOGY: power's returned to MoneyBags!!}; after the match, DiBiase jumps up & down, pumping his fists & yelling @ the top of his lungs, then gets all up in N~E~W~F's grill & flaunts his victory over his nemesis

Reverend Jacob Clemens, all emotional from these lovely ladies that have been fighting for his affections, accompanies Daffney to the ring, where Sosumi Nada's already waiting; after the ring introductions, it's time for the MAIN EVENT, 3rd ROUND, HAUGHTY HOTTIES TITLE TOURNAMENT, FALLS COUNT ANYWHERE MATCH: Sosumi Nada defeats Daffney with a 'Nada Driver' Brainbuster Suplex {PSYCHOLOGY: domo arigato!}; after the match, As-Seen-on-Television champion Jake "The Snake" Roberts, Tornado Tag Team champions Princes of the Universe & World Wide Web champion Deaddy Freddy all come down to the ring, where they present Sosumi with her new title